being more zen…
There is a Taoist story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. "Such bad luck," they said sympathetically.
"Maybe," the farmer replied.
The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. "How wonderful," the neighbors exclaimed.
"Maybe," replied the old man.
The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbors again came to offer their sympathy on his misfortune.
"Maybe," answered the farmer.
The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the son's leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out.
"Maybe," said the farmer.
How many lessons there are in this one short, but powerful, parable. Not being attached to an outcome is the message that speaks to me the most. How many times do we experience something and we immediately label it good or bad? How we can confuse the situation for being desirable or undesirable yet later we realize that what we thought was unfortunate was really a blessing in disguise? Or vice-versa? How much energy was wasted celebrating (or toiling) in the event when having the unattached attitude of the farmer would have saved us much emotional exhaustion?
Then there’s the lesson of constant change. Just when we think things are one way – voila! – the situation changes entirely. And there we are, right back at practicing our non-attachment again. Learning how to roll with whatever life presents to us especially when we were not seeking an altered situation.
And how about not over-reacting? How can this farmer be so even keeled all of the time? Can you channel him next time an unexpected situation happens to you? Or how about when you are emotionally charged about a situation that doesn’t even really “happen” to you, but triggers you to your core? Will you practice farmer-mode, take a deep breath, find your center and not react?
Maybe?